One thing almost everyone can agree on: the transition from high school to college is huge!
As parents face sending their kids off to college, lots of questions typically surface: How solid are my student’s study skills? How about time management, executive function, or problem-solving skills? Do they have the emotional and social maturity to handle this life transition? Will they make new friends? How will they handle this much independence? And, of course, what is my role now as an “absentee parent?”
Some parents, and students themselves, assume (incorrectly) that if the student has done well in high school, they are ready for college. But college presents a whole new set of challenges: living away from home, more demanding academic work, less personalized attention from teachers, a new and more complex social environment to navigate, many more options to choose from, less parental oversight, and much more!
Preparation for college begins long before a student packs up their belongings, long before they receive their acceptance letter, even. It begins when students appreciate just how different college will be from most situations they have been in before and begin to plan for this transition.
The first part of that planning is to engage in an honest assessment of your student’s unique strengths and challenges. This involves, at a minimum, carefully considering the kinds of situations that your student has managed successfully in the past, where they have needed assistance, and how open they are to asking for help (which virtually every college student needs at some point). Students who have well-developed problem-solving skills, and who know how to seek help and advocate for themselves, arrive in college with a huge advantage.
Students also do well to research the support services available at their school. In many cases, it makes sense to contact the offices that offer the kinds of support they anticipate they might need even before they get to campus. This can include mental health services, accommodations for students with learning differences, or even offices that support students with specific cultural or religious interests. You can think of this as an insurance policy: even if students don’t end up using those services, they are well-served to have them lined up in advance, just in case.
Last, but certainly not least, students and parents can use this occasion to have a conversation about the kind of contact they want/need in this new situation. This is a time when students feel a need for more independence from their parents at the very time when parents are longing for more connection with their students who are now further from home than ever before. Clarifying expectations in advance can ensure a smooth transition in which students get both the independence and the support they need.
Of course, students can also get support after they arrive in college. But often “an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.” Why wait for problems to emerge? Wise students and their parents begin preparing for college long before the moment when they drop their kids on campus and drive away, hoping for the best.